


Running in the night

by barbitone



Series: Voltron Fanfiction [57]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Canon-Typical Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Knotting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:15:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23721457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barbitone/pseuds/barbitone
Summary: They say there’s a beast in the mountains. They say it’s fearsome and wild, feral and wicked. They say it’s too powerful to be killed, that it can only be appeased by a sacrifice and once the sacrifice is made it will leave the people be. They say a lot of things, but Prince Lotor knows there must be more bluster than truth to the stories.Anything can be killed, if you only try hard enough.
Relationships: Lotor/Shiro (Voltron)
Series: Voltron Fanfiction [57]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1082916
Comments: 24
Kudos: 97





	Running in the night

**Author's Note:**

> Huge thank you to [Salt_Queen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Salt_Queen/) for betaing!
> 
> Title from Hounds of Love by Kate Bush

* * *

The messenger was wild-eyed and red-faced as he burst into the throne room, panting for breath as he ran forward and dropped to his knees before King Zarkon’s throne.

“Speak,” Zarkon commanded and the messenger swallowed before daring to look up.

“Sire,” he managed. “There’s been- they saw, the people- they saw- a beast. In the mountains.”

“What sort of beast?” Zarkon asked, leaning forward.

“A demon, a- a monster! Black as coal and three times larger than a horse, with wicked fangs and claws, and eyes like embers. It stalks by night and they say it’s already taken three cattle back to its den. Two nights ago it was seen near the village, surely getting ready to attack the people there.”

“A hellhound, then,” Zarkon said, leaning back again. “One hasn’t been seen in these parts for decades.”

“Sire,” General Ranveig stepped forward with a bow. “Allow me to take a dozen knights into the mountains to slay the beast-”

“No,” Zarkon said with a shake of his head. “I won’t lose a dozen men when one will do. We’ll handle this as our people have always done.”

“Father, please,” Lotor couldn’t stop himself from saying, fighting not to flinch when Zarkon turned his sharp gaze on him. “We can’t send an innocent-”

“I will not sacrifice a dozen knights when I can sacrifice a single virgin to appease the beast!” Zarkon said, his voice rising. “Haggar,” he turned to the witch. “Arrange a lottery, that we might fairly choose a youth to-”

“I’ll do it,” Lotor said bitterly. He’d half-expected his father to argue, but he’d never shown Lotor the slightest scrap of care or affection before and he didn’t now.

“Your Highness-” Dayak hissed angrily, the only one who cared enough to try and stop him.

“I am the prince,” Lotor said, his voice ringing loudly through the silent room. “It is only right that I perform this duty for my people. I’ll be the sacrifice so they can be safe.”

“Very well,” Zarkon said, his tone casual and emotionless. “In the morning, then.” And just like that he turned to the next matter at hand, like the sacrifice of his only son meant nothing to him.

* * *

“You foolish boy,” Dayak hissed as she stormed into his rooms that night and pulled him into her arms. “You foolish reckless _stupid_ boy!”

“I’m not,” Lotor muttered as he clutched at her back and buried his face against her shoulder. They swayed slowly as they stood together in his bedchamber and that was the closest he’d come to crying in a long time. Someone cared for him after all. Someone loved him, even if it was just his governess.

But he’d show them all what he was made of, and then none would treat him like a burden or a weakling any longer.

“I’m not,” he said as she took his face in her calloused hands and leaned down to look into his eyes. “I’m going to kill the beast,” he said firmly. “I’m going to kill it and bring its head to my father, and then-”

“Darling, _no,”_ she whispered and kissed him on the forehead before pulling him into another embrace. “No, no, no- these creatures, they’re- they’re wild and dangerous-”

“But I’m fast and cunning,” Lotor said. “I’m strong, too. You know I am! I’m not as weak as they say.”

“Oh darling, of course not but this is- this is something far outside our understanding. Please- it’s not too late to back out-”

“Dayak!” Lotor cried out, pulling away. “If I do that I’ll be even more of a laughing stock than I am now! I- I have to do this. Please, you don’t have to understand, but please just-”

Dayak sighted heavily. “Very well. I won’t fight you on this, though you should know I think you’re just about the stupidest most willful child I’ve ever known.”

“I’m not a child, Dayak,” Lotor said with a watery smile. “I haven’t been for a long time.”

“Don’t get yourself killed. Come back to me, do you understand?”

“I will, Dayak,” he said with more conviction than he felt. “I promise.”

* * *

Lotor couldn’t sleep that night. Instead he dressed in his best traveling clothes and packed his satchel. Afterwards he stood out on the balcony with his cloak held closed over his chest, the icy wind ruffling his hair as he looked down at the quiet town below.

He was the prince but not the heir- the heir was selected by rite of combat after the King’s death. If he left and died it would be no great loss to his father or his people, to anyone at all except for Dayak. If he stayed and lived it would be no great win to anyone either, not even to himself. If he stayed he’d be resigning himself to a lifetime of disregard and disrespect, forever the runt of the Galra litter. But if he left- if he proved his strength… everything would change.

His father would look at him and truly _see_ him, his people would accept him. He wouldn’t have to live as a practical exile anymore for no other reason than his small stature and delicate features- a joke to everyone, even the servants.

When dawn broke Ranveig and his men came to lead Lotor down to the stables.

“Prince Lotor!” Dayak called out just as he was about to mount his horse. She hurried over to him and pressed a small dagger in a worn leather sheath into his hands. “They say only pure silver can kill them,” she whispered.

“Thank you, Dayak,” Lotor said, somehow managing to keep his voice from breaking.

“Be well, my charge,” Dayak said and pressed one last kiss to his forehead before stepping aside.

Lotor kept a stony expression over his face as they rode through the silent streets and out into the forest. The soldiers didn’t talk to him as they traveled. They probably wouldn’t have even on the best of days, but now he was the sacrifice, tainted and cursed.

Slowly the terrain grew rocky as they approached the mountains, and by nightfall they reached a path leading to a dark yawning cave.

“We’re here,” Ranvieg said gruffly. “You’ll continue on your own.”

Lotor dismounted his horse, his palms sweaty and his heart fluttering in his chest. 

“Give me a torch,” he demanded, glaring at one of the soldiers. “Now,” he repeated when the man didn’t move. “I am still your prince!”

The man handed over the torch and Lotor took it with a scowl before turning his back on the Galra soldiers and looking towards the cave. He swallowed heavily as he considered what he had to do next, dropping his hand to the silver dagger at his belt.

“Do you need a push?” Ranveig asked disdainfully. A few of the soldiers snickered and Lotor clenched his teeth tightly as he tried to find the will to move. His knees were shaking but he took a step forward, and then another. It got slightly easier after that and soon he was pausing at the cave mouth. He wanted to turn back and run so desperately but he couldn’t. He simply couldn’t.

He walked inside.

Only a few paces in and the air started to smell of damp and something sharp and unpleasant. It took Lotor a few moments to realize it was the reek of blood, metallic and cloying. He felt ill but forced himself to keep walking, and then he saw the smears of red on the ground, the walls.

His eyes widened as he saw a wide bloody trail like something had been dragged across the stone. He followed the trail with his gaze until he saw a dark heap. Hardly daring to breathe, he stole closer.

It was- it was shaggy and black and _trembling._ It smelled of blood and dirt and something that Lotor could only describe as fear and it was with great horror that he realized he was looking at _the beast._

It most closely resembled a wolf but somehow elongated- its legs long and elegant even as it lay curled up on its side. Its snout was black and its jaw parted as it panted, revealing glistening white teeth. It was huge, though not as big as they said, only slightly bigger than a horse.

The beast whimpered and the sound was so full of pain that Lotor couldn’t hold back a gasp.

“You’re hurt,” he whispered only to flinch when the beast moved its head to look at him. Its eyes were clear and gray and empty of malice as Lotor drew closer, pulling the silver dagger from his belt.

It was hurt. It was weak. It would be so easy to-

The beast whined and tried to shift away, its clawed paws scrabbling uselessly against the ground.

Lotor’s heart seized in his chest with pity. The poor thing was hurting and afraid, it was-

A monster. It was a monster.

Lotor set his jaw and tightened his grip. The monster was panting, its eyes wild with terror and its maw gaping open. It made a small pathetic sound as it tried to move away, and then an even more pathetic sound when it failed. It was bleeding from the face, the shoulder, only the gods knew where else. It was weak and he had to kill it and-

The monster shivered and whined, the sound so close to a human moan that Lotor froze. Despite everything, this didn’t seem… _right._ This couldn’t be right.

He needed to kill the thing and bring its head back to his father, but- but-

“It’s alright,” he said, putting his knife back in its sheath and setting the torch carefully down on the ground. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

The beast was still whimpering in pain but it didn’t try to pull away when Lotor took a careful step closer.

“It’s going to be alright,” he whispered, leaning forward to try and get a better look.

Its fur was matted and filthy with blood but he couldn’t see any wounds, at least not in the dim light of the torch a few paces away. What exactly could he do even if he found where the beast was hurt? Nothing.

He reached out to the beast’s face only for it to snap weakly at him with its teeth and he jerked back. For lack of anything better to do Lotor moved away and stood, retrieving the torch.

“I’m going to take a look around and be right back,” Lotor said and wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t like the thing understood him. But maybe the sound of his voice might be soothing to the creature. At the very least it didn’t seem to be making anything worse.

The cave continued onwards past where the beast lay and Lotor walked forward. Maybe he could find water, or food, or- or- something.

The passage soon opened into a larger chamber and Lotor raised the torch to get a better look. To his surprise it seemed like someone was living here. There was a banked fire and a tidy pile of firewood against the wall and a mess of furs in the corner. Lotor built the fire back up to stave off the chill, his gaze falling to a small pot sitting beside it.

Why would there be a pot? Did the beast have a human held captive here somewhere? It didn’t make any sense. There were other caverns leading off from the main chamber and Lotor thought he could hear rushing water in the distance.

There wasn’t much else to see so he returned the way he’d come, going back out to check on the beast.

It was still and silent now and for some reason dread filled Lotor’s gut. Maybe it was dead. 

Wouldn’t that solve all his problems? He could saw its head off without having to kill it himself. He could return home and be a hero.

He set the torch down and crept closer. The beast wasn’t moving but as he stared he could see the unmistakable rise and fall of its chest. It was alive.

It didn’t wake as he reached forward and stroked its face with trembling fingers. Its fur was thick and soft, pleasant to the touch where it wasn’t matted and damp with blood. The creature snorted in its sleep and Lotor pulled back with a gasp.

What was he doing? The thing could take his arm off with a single bite.

He moved away and settled against the opposite wall, keeping watch. His mind was buzzing with a cloud of questions and half-formed plans. 

What was he _doing?_ He should kill the thing and take its head back to the father. He should do that, but he knew he couldn’t, not now at least. 

He could simply leave while the creature was hurt. But where would he go? He couldn’t go home to be branded a traitor and a coward.

And most of all- if he left would the creature continue to terrorize the townsfolk? There was a seed of doubt nagging at him, doubt at their old legends and methods. How much of them were really true?

His eyes were heavy as he pondered what to do next. He was so tired after the worry, the day spent on horseback, the fear. He was so tired from all of it, his duties and his hopes, his nightmares and dreams.

It was a terrible idea to let his guard down beside the giant monster. But it was weak and tired, it wouldn’t try to hurt him. It probably wouldn’t…

Lotor didn’t notice letting his head fall back against the stone and drifting off into a deep and dreamless sleep.

* * *

He woke to a cry and opened his eyes to see-

A man, nude and stained with blood, whimpering and shaking as he tried to curl into a ball. The monster was nowhere to be found.

“Are you alright?” Lotor blurted out.

The man jerked to look over at him in shock and flinched away. 

The cave was dark, lit only by what little sunlight managed to filter into the passage. Even in the dim lighting Lotor could see that the man was handsome and strong, for all that he was stained with blood. He looked young, only a year or two older than Lotor himself, and his eyes were a clear gray, just like-

Lotor’s mouth fell open in shock. It was the beast. It didn’t make any sense, but somehow the beast was a man.

“Stay back,” the man said, his voice coming out hoarse and full of terror.

“It’s alright,” Lotor said.

“Stay back!” the man cried out, shifting away from him. He flinched as he moved, keeping his hand pressed to a wound in his side. He was pale and muscular, his powerful body covered in old scars.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Lotor said in confusion.

“Just stay back!” the man yelled.

Lotor got to his feet and the man flinched.

“Alright,” Lotor said, taking a few steps back and raising his hands in a placating gesture. The man looked over at him suspiciously while Lotor made a point of standing perfectly still.

“You’re hurt,” he continued quietly. “Let me-”

“Get away!” the man repeated.

Lotor grit his teeth, suddenly annoyed at the man’s obstinance. He was a _prince,_ and no matter how his people disrespected him they still _obeyed._

“Stop being ridiculous!” he snapped in his best impression of Dayak’s scolding tone. “I’m not going to hurt you, and if I were, you couldn’t stop me anyway in your pitiful state. Now- you’re going to let me help you to the fire and clean you up and then you’ll get some real rest instead of freezing to death on the ground!”

The man’s eyes widened in shock at the lecture, and though he still flinched when Lotor took a step forward Lotor ignored him.

“Can you walk?” he asked.

“I- I don’t-” the man stuttered.

“I suppose we’ll see,” Lotor said and took him by the arm. The man screamed when Lotor pulled him up into a sitting position and Lotor winced at the pure agony in his voice. But he wasn’t fighting, and Lotor couldn’t just leave him on the cold stone, so he helped him to stand.

The man was heavy and unsteady on his feet but Lotor managed to lead him back into the main room where the fire was still burning merrily from when he’d built it up earlier. He got the stranger settled beside it and filled the pot from the waterskin in his satchel before pulling a handkerchief from his pocket. It seemed painfully inadequate for the task before him but it would have to do.

The man hissed and pulled away when Lotor first tried to clean the wound in his side but Lotor glared up at him. “Stop that!” the snapped in his best Dayak voice and thankfully the man let him work in peace after that.

The wound in his side wasn’t too deep and the cut over his face was already scabbed over. It seemed miraculous considering how much blood was spilled over the stone just outside. Lotor didn’t dwell on it, wiping the blood and dirt off the stranger’s skin as best he could.

“Who are you?” the stranger asked, staring as Lotor dipped the handkerchief into the water in the pot and started wiping down his muscular chest, fighting not to blush. This wasn’t the time for it, no matter how handsome the stranger was, how broad his shoulders were or how narrow his waist was, how well-built his thighs were, and- 

It was a struggle not to look at his groin but somehow Lotor managed it, keeping his eyes fixed on an oddly shaped stone just past the man’s hip as he bathed him.

“My name is Lotor,” he said. “And you?”

“I’m Shiro,” he said in a near whisper. “Why are you here? Why are you helping me?”

Lotor shrugged awkwardly, not meeting Shiro’s eyes. What could he say? That he’d volunteered to come here as a sacrifice? That he’d intended to kill him and bring his head as a trophy to his father? None of that seemed quite right anymore.

“Just passing through,” he lied. “Figured… figured you could use some help.”

To his surprise Shiro’s lips curled up into a sad little smile. “You reek of silver,” he said. “You came here to kill me.”

Lotor looked up at him in shock only to see Shiro looking back at him calmly. He was at a loss for words, and then he tightened his lips into a scowl and looked away. 

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he muttered, not sure why he was trying to hide the truth that the monster, the man, already knew. “I- I’m as finished as I can be for now. You should get some rest.”

Shiro nodded and grunted as he rose shakily to his feet, Lotor hurrying to stand and support him before leading him over to the pile of furs. He helped Shiro lie down and stepped back, pausing for a moment before moving to unfasten his cloak and draping it over the man, covering his nakedness.

“When will you kill me, then?” Shiro asked, looking up at him. “Will you wait until I’m healed so I can be better sport for you?”

Lotor tightened his lips into a thin line, not sure what emotion was uncurling in his heart. Something uncertain and shivering, something warm and plaintive. “Not today,” was all he managed to say.

“I see,” Shiro said, turning his face into the furs and closing his eyes. “You’d best be gone by nightfall. For your own sake.” He was asleep before Lotor had even registered his words. He sighed sharply and stepped away.

He still had no idea what he was doing, but all he knew for sure was that he wasn’t leaving. Not yet.

He poured the bloodstained water out of the pot before settling next to the fire and rooting through his pack to pull out some supplies. He was starving and he broke his fast with some bread and cheese and dried meat, looking at Shiro’s face as he chewed thoughtfully. Once he was finished he retrieved his torch and lit it at the fire, grabbing a bit of charcoal before going down to explore the caverns.

He marked his way with the charcoal as he went so he wouldn’t get lost, jotting notes down on the stone wall whenever he found anything interesting. This way to water, this way to a patch of mushrooms, this way to a hot spring. The cave system was surprisingly elaborate and Lotor found several paths that led him above ground in the first few hours. The forest around the mountains was lush and fertile, full of game trails and edible plants.

Lotor found a patch of berries and spent the better part of an hour gathering them into his satchel before the sun started to set and he returned to the cave with some trepidation.

 _You’d best be gone by nightfall,_ Shiro had said. _For your own sake._

But there was nowhere for him to go, not until he killed Shiro. With each passing moment that seemed more and more impossible.

Shiro was still sleeping peacefully when Lotor came back to the fire, building it up again and going off to fill the pot with fresh water.

He was eating a supper of berries and bread when Shiro started to _scream._

Lotor jerked up, dropping his food as he stared at Shiro writhing over the pile of furs. He’d managed to kick off the cloak and his skin was glistening with sweat, each corded muscle standing out in stark relief in the flickering firelight.

Shiro’s skin was growing dark before Lotor’s eyes, turning black and sprouting fur. He screamed as his limbs elongated with sickening cracks and when his face began to transform Lotor scrambled to his feet and looked away, fighting to hold back nausea. Screams turned to whimpers as Shiro lost the ability of human speech, and then there was silence, and-

A low dangerous growl.

Lotor looked up, his blood running cold as the beast stood before him. It wasn’t injured at all anymore; it was sleek and powerful and dangerous as it stalked forward.

Lotor’s breath caught in his throat as he backed away. Too soon his back hit the wall and he realized he was trapped. Terror engulfed him, blinding him to anything but the beast’s clear gray eyes staring him down. He was frozen as the beast leaned towards him. How had he thought he could kill it? And with just a tiny little dagger at that?

The beast wasn’t growling anymore. It bent its head to sniff at Lotor’s hair, his shirt, and then it opened its maw, revealing two white rows of wickedly sharp teeth, and moved forward to drag its thick wet tongue over the side of Lotor’s face. 

Lotor made a sound like a terrified squeak and the beast sat back on its haunches, tilting its head to the side to stare at him.

“Oh,” Lotor breathed out shakily. “Oh. Uh. Friends, then?”

The beast moved forward to nuzzle his chest with its face and Lotor stroked its head hesitantly, running his fingers gently over the beast’s velvety ears, the thick fur on its neck. It huffed out a soft sound like a sigh and moved back, licking him again.

“Ugh, gross,” Lotor said, wiping the slobber off his face with the back of his hand.

The beast’s ears perked up and it turned to look towards the cave mouth. Between one second and the next it was gone, taken off out into the forest beyond. Lotor ran after it, suddenly desperately afraid that it was going to hurt someone-

It was already gone, impossible to find in the darkness. He’d never be able to track it, and even if he did- he’d never be able to kill it. But maybe it wouldn’t hurt anyone anyway. Maybe _Shiro_ wouldn’t hurt anyone anyway. He hadn’t yet, had he?

The report had been about cattle after all, not people. And he hadn’t hurt Lotor either even when he’d had the chance.

Lotor sighed and went back to the fire. What else could he do? He finished eating in silence and tossed some more fuel into the flames before going over to the pile of furs and curling up with his back to the wall. He was exhausted and it wasn’t long before he was dragged towards sleep.

He woke sometime later to quiet panting and opened his eyes to see that the beast had returned to lie next to him. It turned its head to look back at him, blinking slowly. Apparently it wasn’t particularly troubled by what it saw because it promptly closed its eyes and fell asleep. Even as he wondered if he was crazy, Lotor did the same.

* * *

“You’re alive.”

Lotor opened his eyes to see Shiro looking down at him with his eyes wide in shock. His wounds were completely healed, leaving only faint scars behind. There were so many scars- Lotor couldn’t help running his gaze over them, the faint tracery covering Shiro’s arms, his chest-

“And you’re naked,” Lotor muttered, forcing himself to look away. “Don’t you ever wear clothes?”

“I-” Shiro looked down at himself and blushed, shifting to raise his knee a little to hide his groin.

Lotor sat up and pulled his cloak over before drawing his knife. Shiro gasped and scrambled away, his eyes going comically wide with fear.

“I’m not going to kill you,” Lotor said. “Not today,” he added with a smile. He cut a strip from the cloak and a hole in the center before tossing it over and putting away the knife. “Put that on.”

Shiro slid his head through the hole and Lotor stood to walk closer, using the strip he’d cut as a belt to wrap around Shiro’s waist. He looked rather ragged in the makeshift tunic but it was still better than having him parading about in the nude.

“Thank you,” Shiro said, running his hands over the fabric.

“Where did you come from, anyway?” Lotor asked. “You weren’t always here, that’s for sure.”

Shiro shrugged and looked away awkwardly, running his hand through his hair. It was messy and dark, reaching past his shoulders. There was a leaf in it and Lotor reached out to pluck it away without thinking, pausing as Shiro stared at him in shock.

“Sorry,” he muttered and went to sit by the fire to eat what was left of last night’s berries and the remains of his supplies. “Would you like some?” he asked, offering up his last slice of bread.

Shiro hesitated before coming closer and sitting beside the fire. “Thank you,” he said, taking the bread and biting into it slowly. He closed his eyes in obvious pleasure as he chewed and Lotor found he couldn’t look away.

“I take it it’s been a while since you’ve had bread,” Lotor guessed.

Shiro shrugged again, taking another bite. “I guess,” he said quietly. “I’m not sure. There’s a lot I’m not sure of these days.”

“So you haven’t always been…” Lotor waved vaguely and was surprised when Shiro smiled wryly.

“No,” he said, his voice nearly a whisper. “I haven’t always been.”

“What happened to you?”

“I’m tired,” Shiro said, standing abruptly.

“Well you’ve been up all night, haven’t you,” Lotor said.

Shiro flinched, looking away. “Thank you for- for-” he stopped and Lotor could swear he was trembling. “Still, you’d better- you’d better go. Before nightfall.”

“For my own sake,” Lotor said, watching as Shiro went to lay down, curling up with his back to Lotor. He seemed to fall asleep, though Lotor had a feeling he was faking. He finished his breakfast in silence and went out through the caves towards the forest.

He’d been on enough hunting trips and expeditions with uncaring companions to know how to fend for himself. He set up snares on the game trails and collected mushrooms, fetched fresh water and firewood seeing as how the stack was running low. The chores passed the time until nightfall and Lotor returned in time to hear Shiro scream and watched him transform once again.

The beast didn’t growl this time as he laid eyes on him, only padded over and nudged him in the chest with his snout before licking him on the face and getting slobber in his hair.

Lotor laughed and pushed his face away before scratching him behind the ear. “Some monster you are,” he muttered. “You’re friendlier than my father’s hounds.”

The beast made a sound like a bark but lower and breathier and loped away into the night, returning some time later to curl up beside Lotor on the pile of furs.

When dawn broke Shiro was still asleep and Lotor threw the tattered cloak over him before going down to the spring to wash and checking the traps he’d set the night before. Breakfast was a nice bit of roast rabbit and Shiro roused to the smell of cooking meat, padding over sheepishly when Lotor patted the ground beside him.

“Does it happen every night?” he asked, staring into the fire as he chewed.

“I guess,” Shiro said. “Every night so far.”

“Does it hurt?”

Shiro scowled, poking at the fire with a stick. “No, it feels wonderful. That’s why I scream so loud, from how wonderful it feels.”

Lotor was silent for a long moment, feeling sorry he’d asked. “Can you… control it?”

“Stop it,” Shiro said. “Stop- asking questions, stop- staying here! Don’t you have somewhere else to be? Don’t you have- friends, a family who wants you?”

“No,” Lotor said, glaring over at him. He thought of Dayak and immediately felt ashamed of his words. “Not exactly, anyway,” he muttered.

“Sorry,” Shiro said, deflating and dropping his head into his hands. “I’m sorry. That was- that was rude of me. I’m sorry. I’m- angry a lot these days. At- at everything.”

“At the townsfolk?” Lotor asked carefully.

Shiro shook his head. “I stay away from the townsfolk,” he said. “I try, anyway. That night when you came- I hadn’t been able to get a deer in- in- weeks, maybe. It’s hard to tell, everything’s… hazy. I think I went for a sheep, and there were- men, farmers-”

“They hurt you,” Lotor said, oddly angry at the thought of it.

“They had a right,” Shiro whispered. “It- it was their sheep. And I- well. You’ve seen it. Me. Like that. It’s-”

“You’re a giant pup,” Lotor bit out. “You’ve licked my face three times now.”

“Really?” Shiro asked with a startled laugh. “I don’t- it’s hard to remember.”

“Well,” Lotor said with a shrug. “I’ll remember for the both of us. Maybe you won’t turn tonight. Maybe you can stop it.”

“Don’t you think I’ve tried to stop it?” Shiro asked. “Every night I try-” he broke off, breathing hard.

Lotor watched shrewdly as Shiro’s chin trembled and he turned away, wiping at his face. “I’m tired,” he whispered.

“Go on and rest then,” Lotor said. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Why?” Shiro asked.

Lotor shrugged, turning back to the fire and the rabbit. “I don’t have anywhere else to be.”

Shiro didn’t seem satisfied with that answer but he didn’t press the issue as he curled up on the furs. Lotor watched him a while before rising and busying himself with a new set of tasks. He washed the old blood from the stone at the mouth of the cave and went out looking for clay so he could make a decent fireplace. He found rushes instead and gathered as many as he could carry. He got so caught up in the work that he didn’t notice the sun starting to set. By the time he’d made it back to the cave it was fully dark and he cursed himself as he stumbled towards the dim glow of the fire.

Shiro had already turned by then and was padding around the main chamber sniffing the air and whimpering.

“What’s wrong?” Lotor asked in alarm, dropping the rushes to the ground. The beast’s ears perked up and he ran over with a joyful bark, nearly barreling him over in his enthusiasm.

“Missed me?” Lotor laughed, ducking away from the beast’s slobbering tongue. He wasn’t crying anymore but wagging his tail instead. “Good pup,” Lotor murmured, scratching behind the beast’s ears. He wondered if Shiro could understand him, if he’d remember this in the morning. “Go on then,” he said, motioning to the cave mouth. “Good hunting.”

The beast took off and Lotor looked after him thoughtfully. He gathered up the rushes and stowed them away in the corner of the cave, thinking about tomorrow’s chores as he got ready for bed. It was simpler than thinking about anything else. The castle, the kingdom, his father- it all seemed so far away now. It was easier to focus on the small tasks at hand.

He fell asleep thinking about how he’d weave some mats to cover the cold stone floor, and wondered how hard it would be to clean the furs, they were getting a little musty, and…

* * *

In the morning there was another rabbit in the snare and Lotor prepared it silently as he waited for Shiro to wake.

“You’re here,” Shiro said, though he didn’t sound very surprised this time around.

Lotor didn’t bother answering, simply offering up some food.

“Do you remember anything from last night?” he asked as Shiro ducked his head and ate.

“Flashes,” he said, blushing. “I remember- worry, fear. I feared you’d… gone.”

“I didn’t,” Lotor said, smiling a little as he bent to catch a glimpse of Shiro’s face.

“You said I was… _good,”_ Shiro whispered.

“Aren’t you?” Lotor asked and Shiro’s blush deepened as he jerked to his feet.

“I’m- I’m tired,” he said, his voice coming out strangled.

“Oh no,” Lotor said, standing and grabbing Shiro’s wrist. Shiro flinched and looked back at him, his eyes wide with surprise and some other inexplicable emotion. “You can rest after you wash.”

When Shiro didn’t seem convinced Lotor schooled his expression in his best imitation of Dayak’s scowl.

“You’re filthy,” he said. “And if we’re to share bedding every night I can’t have that. So you’ll wash, and then you can sleep. Agreed?”

Shiro’s lips quirked up into a smile and in that single moment all the weariness and pain seemed to fade away. “Agreed,” he said.

Lotor pulled a small bar of soap out of his satchel and handed it over.

“Hair, too. And behind the ears.”

“I know how to wash,” Shiro said, still smiling. 

“Well how am I to know?” Lotor asked, pursing his lips. “Seeing as how you’ve never done it in my presence before. You’re some kind of beast man living in a cave, for all I know you’ve never seen soap in your life.”

“I’ve seen soap,” Shiro said with a laugh. “Thank you,” he added, his eyes going oddly soft before he turned and went off into the caves.

Lotor finished breakfast and turned to the rushes, weaving them into mats as best he could. It was simple enough, and a calming task. He almost didn’t notice Shiro returning, but when he did he couldn’t rip his eyes away from Shiro’s hair- soft and not greasy for the first time since he’d met him. He looked happier now that he was clean and to Lotor’s surprise he sat down beside him and pulled over a handfull of rushes, glancing over at what Lotor was doing before copying his motions to make his own mat.

“I thought you were tired,” Lotor said.

“Not so much anymore,” Shiro said with a small smile. “It’s been a while since I’ve done anything to…” he shrugged. “I’d gotten used to being alone, living like an animal. But now you’re here fixing up the place, and I just- I-” he blushed and looked away. “I want to help, is all,” he added.

“Oh,” Lotor said. He turned back to the work and tried to find the peace from before, but Shiro’s presence at his side made the whole thing somehow tense, like the very air was shivering. This was the longest Shiro had ever been awake and it was a struggle not to look over at him. Lotor watched his hands out of the corner of his eye, strong and clever as he wove the rushes together neatly.

“I was a soldier, before,” Shiro said quietly and Lotor startled, nearly dropping the mat he’d been working on. “In the Queen’s army.”

“You’re from Altea?” Lotor asked in surprise.

Shiro simply nodded, his fingers never faltering and his gaze never straying from his work. “I was on patrol when we were ambushed by a beast, or maybe there were more than one. It was dark, and-” he shivered, his shoulders rising tensely. “We fought them back but I got bit. Everything went a bit blurry after that. It’s been… a long time, I think. I don’t know how long.”

“You’re a long way from home,” Lotor said carefully. Altea was several weeks of hard riding to the west and longer by foot.

“I don’t have a home anymore,” Shiro said. “I never really did. That’s why I joined the army in the first place, to have… somewhere I belonged. Someone I belonged to.”

“I understand,” Lotor said quietly. “I never really belonged either.”

“That’s why you’re spending your days with some kind of unwashed beast man living in a cave?”

Lotor looked up to see Shiro grinning and scowled, his cheeks feeling oddly hot. “Well you’re washed now, aren’t you?”

“More or less,” Shiro laughed. “I might have forgotten to scrub behind the ears.”

“I knew it,” Lotor said, biting back a smile.

“What about you?” Shiro asked. “Are you a soldier too?”

Lotor laughed, the thought preposterous. Someone like him could never be a soldier in the Galra army- he was far too small. It had been a struggle to even get anyone to give him combat lessons at all. He was lucky he hadn’t been simply left out to die as an infant, a sacrifice to their gods.

“No, I’m not a soldier,” he said, oddly charmed that Shiro would even think such a thing was possible.

“You’re a medic then,” Shiro guessed and Lotor could only laugh again. “An astronomer? A bookbinder. An apothecary.”

Each suggestion was more preposterous than the next and by the time Shiro guessed he was actually a blacksmith Lotor was holding his gut and gasping for breath, his face aching from laughter. It had been a long time since he’d laughed like that.

“Stop it,” he managed, nudging Shiro in the side. He wondered what Shiro would say if Lotor told him the truth- that he was a prince. Would he be impressed? Angry? Afraid? Would he treat him differently, ruining the strange warmth building between them?

“I’m no one,” Lotor said at last, growing somber again as he realized it was true. There was no going back for him, not unless he killed Shiro. He looked up into Shiro’s smiling face, his gray eyes, and knew he could never do it. So that was it then. He was nothing and no one.

His vision was oddly blurry and his hands were trembling. He looked down at the mat he’d been weaving, blinking furiously as he forced himself to continue. Now wasn’t the time to fall apart. He refused to allow himself to do it. He took a deep breath, shutting his eyes for a moment as he forced himself to calm and clear his mind, turning his thoughts to something else.

“I think one of these days I’ll go into town,” he said, somehow managing to keep his voice steady. “You need some real clothes, and we could use some other things too, supplies and the like. A decent pot, perhaps, and maybe a net. I think there might be fish in the stream-”

 _“Lotor,”_ Shiro said firmly and Lotor looked up to see Shiro’s eyebrows drawn down in concern. “You don’t have to stay here,” he said quietly. “You should really go, for your own sake. You can build a life for yourself, any life you like. You’re clever and strong, you can build something good for yourself instead of- of- living in a dank cave with a monster.”

“You’re not a monster,” Lotor said sharply before turning back down to the rushes with a scowl. 

“I want to build a proper stove,” he muttered, shoving all the fear and uncertainty buzzing through his mind down, burying it with simple plans and tasks. “With a chimney, so the cave doesn’t fill with smoke. And I want to start saving firewood, when winter comes it might be hard to come by. We should get salt, to start preserving meat, or maybe we could dry and smoke it.”

He kept talking while Shiro sat and worked quietly beside him. As long as he kept talking he wouldn’t have to think about his kingdom or his father, Dayak waiting for him to return. He wasn’t going to return.

Shiro gasped and dropped the mat he’d been working on, cradling his head in his hands.

“Shiro?” Lotor asked fearfully.

“Gods,” Shiro gritted out, his voice trembling. He screamed and fell to the stone, shaking. It must have been nightfall.

“Shiro,” he said loudly, setting his hand on Shiro’s shoulder. “Shiro, look at me!”

Shiro forced his eyes open with a wince. He parted his lips to pant and his teeth seemed different- sharp.

“Look at me,” Lotor said, taking him by the shoulders. “You’re not a monster. You can control it.”

Shiro cried out, his back arching as he clutched at his chest, his fingernails closer to claws.

“It’s alright, Shiro,” Lotor murmured. “Everything’s going to be alright. Just look at me-”

Shiro’s skin glistened with sweat, his hair bristling. But he was still looking at Lotor, his jaw tense and teeth gritted together. He was still human.

“Look at me,” Lotor insisted. “Remember who you are. Shiro-”

“Keep- keep talking,” Shiro managed.

“Alright,” Lotor said, stroking the side of Shiro’s sweaty face, pushing his hair back from his eyes. He kept talking, using Shiro’s name as much as he could, ordering Shiro to _look at him_ every time he closed his eyes, writhing over the stone. He didn’t know how long it lasted, but slowly Shiro relaxed, breathing hard as he shivered, unchanged.

“You’re alright,” Lotor said, just as amazed as Shiro seemed to be as he raised his hands and stared at them. His nails were blunt and human again. “Open your mouth, let me see your teeth,” Lotor ordered.

Shiro stared at him in surprise and then did as he was told while Lotor leaned forward to get a better look. Human.

Lotor grinned and Shiro let his head drop back to the stone, closing his eyes as he panted quietly.

“I’ll- I’ll get you some water,” Lotor said, moving to rise and startling when Shiro grabbed his wrist.

“Don’t go,” he whispered hoarsely.

“Oh,” Lotor breathed out, shocked at the desperation in Shiro’s voice. “I won’t. It’s alright, I won’t.”

He let himself look at Shiro, really _look_ at him as he lay on the stone. He was so handsome and strong, so perfectly relaxed for one beautiful moment.

“Shiro,” Lotor whispered despite himself, wanting to savor the name over his tongue.

Shiro’s eyes snapped open, perfect and clear, a piercing gray. For a second Lotor couldn’t catch his breath and he swallowed heavily. “Let’s- let’s go lie down,” he said. “Let’s go together,” he added hurriedly when Shiro frowned. “It’ll be better than the cold stone. Let’s just-”

He took Shiro’s hands in his and was gratified when Shiro smiled a little. “Yes,” Shiro said. “Yes, alright. Let’s-”

Lotor helped him up and led him over to the pile of furs, where they laid down together. Lotor didn’t think too hard about the fact that he was still holding Shiro’s hand.

Lotor tightened his hold over Shiro’s hand and looked away, biting his lip. What did this mean? Shiro could stop himself from turning, _had_ stopped himself from turning. If he could control it they could do anything. They could live in town, they could- _Lotor_ could- return home, maybe. He could claim his kingdom and-

“Thank you,” Shiro whispered quietly. “I couldn’t have… If it weren’t for- Thank you.”

“You’re in control,” Lotor said. “Just like I told you.”

“Yes,” Shiro said with a small laugh. “You were right. Thank you.”

“Alright, stop that,” Lotor said with a faint grimace. “Just- sleep now. Alright?”

Shiro closed his eyes, still smiling, and Lotor couldn’t help brushing the hair back from his forehead. His mind was racing as he thought about everything that was suddenly possible. He’d been convinced that this was his life, but maybe it could be temporary. Maybe he could have something better.

* * *

Everything seemed to get better after that. Shiro stayed awake during the days and they collected firewood and water and whatever food they could forage. They worked together to weave mats to cover the cold floor and built a stove out of riverstones and clay. They carved a bench and chairs out of tree trunks and they talked, too. Shiro opened up about his life, what he could remember of it, at least. As the days passed Lotor grew more and more nervous about his own lie of ommission. Didn’t Shiro deserve to know who Lotor was? Why he’d come here in the first place?

Every night as Shiro went to turn Lotor talked to him and stroked his hair, holding him close. Every night Shiro managed to stop it and they went to bed beside each other, sleeping with their hands clasped together tightly.

“I think if you can prevent turning,” Lotor said one morning as they broke their fast, “you can make it happen as well.”

Shiro looked up slowly, frowning. “Why- why would I _want_ that?”

“Any number of reasons,” Lotor said with a shrug. “To fight or hunt. To- to run great distances. Don’t you want to be in control?”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” Shiro said firmly, standing from the fire and walking away.

Lotor looked after him. He felt nervous about having said anything at all, afraid that Shiro was angry with him now. Eventually Shiro came back and they didn’t mention the conversation again for a full week until Shiro ducked his head during lunch.

“I want to try,” he said in a near whisper.

“Try what?” Lotor asked.

“Try to… transform,” Shiro said. “I think I could, if you helped me.”

“Let’s try now,” Lotor said, pushing his food away.

“Now?” Shiro asked in alarm. “But- it’s not nightfall.”

“So? Do you think that matters?”

“Maybe not,” Shiro said. “Alright. Let’s try it now.” He raised his hands to his belt and blushed, ducking his head. “Do you mind…?”

“Oh,” Lotor said, feeling a little faint as he turned around so Shiro could have a bit of privacy as he undressed. He was blushing too as he listened to the quiet rustling of fabric behind him.

“Ok,” Shiro said uncertainly and Lotor turned to see him kneeling on the ground with the makeshift tunic draped over his hips.

“What do you need me to do?”

“I’m not… not sure,” Shiro said with a small smile.

“Alright,” Lotor said, moving to kneel in front of him. “Well…” he reached out and carefully took Shiro’s face in his hands. “Think about how you feel when you transform, and try to… try to hold on to that feeling if you can.”

“Alright,” Shiro said, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes.

“Don’t be scared,” Lotor said quietly. “It’ll be alright, you’re in control. All this time- you’ve never hurt me, never hurt anyone in the village.”

“Other than a few sheep,” Shiro muttered.

Lotor couldn’t help laughing. “Sheep don’t count. Come on, Shiro. Think about how it feels to turn-”

Shiro shivered with a soft exhale and Lotor’s eyes widened as he watched Shiro’s hair bristling and his skin growing darker.

“That’s it,” Lotor said. “It’s working. Stay focused.”

“Ah,” Shiro panted, hunching his soldiers. “L-Lotor-”

“You can do it,” Lotor said, “you’re doing it.”

“Get back,” Shiro said, his voice coming out strained.

Lotor scrambled away, breathing hard as he watched Shiro transform. It was happening slower now than before. He wasn’t screaming, just taking slow deliberate breaths. Hair sprouted over his body, his limbs elongated slowly and when his face began to transform Lotor looked away, shutting his eyes.

After a few moments the cave fell silent and he looked up to see the beast- Shiro- standing before him.

“H-hey,” Lotor managed, rising to his feet slowly. Logically he knew he had no reason to be afraid but he could still feel fear shivering through him.

Shiro opened his mouth to pant, his giant red tongue lolling out. He barked happily, wagging his tail like an innocent pup as he came closer to circle Lotor, nudging him in the chest with his face.

“Hey,” Lotor laughed, scratching him behind the ears. “It worked, huh?”

Shiro barked and Lotor grinned at him. His eyes were still clear and gray- Shiro’s eyes.

“Can you understand me?” Lotor asked on a whim.

Shiro tilted his head to the side and Lotor leaned closer, taking his face in his hands.

“If you can understand me- blink twice.”

Shiro _winked_ at him, and then he did it again and Lotor laughed.

“Amazing! You’re amazing!”

Shiro barked happily and broke away to pad through the cave, sniffing at everything curiously. And then he was back and circling Lotor, nudging him in the back, the thighs.

“What?” Lotor asked with a laugh. “What do you want?”

Shiro lay down before him, flicking his ear and looking at the cave entrance pointedly before looking back at Lotor.

“You want me to…” Lotor asked uncertainly, reaching out to stroke Shiro’s fur.

Shiro flicked his ear again and Lotor swallowed heavily, moving closer to climb onto Shiro’s back.

“Is- is this-” he stuttered only to yelp and clutch at Shiro’s fur as he stood with a bark. “Alright,” Lotor breathed out, oddly exhilarated as Shiro started walking towards the cave mouth, speeding up until he was sprinting through the sunlit forest.

Lotor whooped with excitement despite himself, gasping in shock at how _fast_ they were moving. He bent and wrapped his arms around Shiro’s neck, turning his head to the side to stare at the forest rushing past them. Everything was green and vibrant, the sunlight filtering through the trees making the undergrowth glow gold. Shiro’s body was so powerful beneath him as he moved confidently over narrow game trails and leapt up boulders like they were nothing.

It lasted forever and was over too soon when they reached a waterfall cascading into a flower-lined pool. Shiro paused, panting, and lay down in the grass.

“Woah,” Lotor laughed, climbing off his back to collapse beside him, his whole body trembling. Shiro turned to look at him, panting for a moment before licking his face and standing. He bounded into the pool of water with a loud splash and Lotor laughed as he watched, pushing himself up into a sitting position and wrapping his arms around his knees. It was warm in the meadow, the air smelled sweet.

Shiro was splashing around in the pool with all the enthusiasm of a pup and Lotor couldn’t help smiling as he watched. There must have been fish in the pool because Shiro paused, staring into the water intently before ducking his whole head underneath and snapping his teeth. He came up snorting and shaking his head and Lotor couldn’t help laughing, pausing when Shiro turned to look at him and slowly stalked out of the water.

“No,” Lotor said with a smile, getting to his feet and stumbling back. “Wait a minute- Shiro, no!”

Shiro barked and shook the water out of his coat, completely soaking him while Lotor tried to shield his face with his hands. When he opened his eyes Shiro was staring at him with an impossibly self-satisfied smirk. How did he even manage that with the face of a wolf?

With another bark Shiro nudged him in the back towards the pool and Lotor laughed, blushing. It was obvious what Shiro wanted, what he’d brought him here for. He wanted to show Lotor this beautiful place. And… the sun was high in the sky, the water seemed fine. As Shiro ran off to go splash around again Lotor slowly pulled off his clothes before slipping into the pool.

The water felt amazing against his flushed skin and he couldn’t help noticing the small golden fish swimming around. Suddenly Shiro was back, licking his face and swimming around him, and Lotor couldn’t help laughing and flailing, splashing him with water.

They roughhoused for a while and it was unbelievable how _gentle_ Shiro was with him, even in his unwieldy wolf form, and Lotor realized he’d never felt this safe or carefree in his life. Everything else seemed so far away, all his troubles and worries seemed as distant as the stars and just about as relevant. Eventually Shiro tired and padded out of the pool, shaking himself off before curling up in a patch of sunlit grass for a nap. For a while Lotor floated in the pool alone, contemplating the future as he listened to the rushing water.

When he grew tired he climbed out too, pulling his clothes on over damp skin and lying down beside Shiro with a satisfied sigh. They hadn’t exactly gotten much accomplished today- but they had firewood and water and food. And wasn’t this a victory in its own way? 

If Shiro could control his curse, or condition, or whatever it was- that meant they could go anywhere, do anything. They could travel the world together.

Lotor drifted off to warm idle fantasies and never once questioned that somewhere along the way he’d made the decision to stay with Shiro for good.

He woke to a slick tongue running over his face and opened his eyes to see Shiro standing over him, looking at him expectantly. The sun was down and the moon was high in the sky.

“Time to go home, huh,” Lotor murmured and Shiro huffed out a soft sigh, moving to lie down so Lotor could climb on his back.

The trek home was slow and peaceful. Shiro was warm beneath him, his fur thick and lush. And then they were back in their cave and Lotor climbed off with a groan, turning to watch as Shiro shuddered, his back arching as he grew smaller. His fur receded and then he was human again, gasping as he stumbled to his knees.

“Shiro,” Lotor said in alarm as he moved to support him.

“I’m- that was-” Shiro looked up at him with a weak smile. “That was amazing.”

“Yeah,” Lotor said, grinning as he stared into Shiro’s eyes, the dazzled expression over his face.

“It didn’t hurt at all that time.”

“Come on,” Lotor said, ducking under Shiro’s arm and helping him up. He couldn’t help blushing as he led Shiro over to the furs. It was the first time he’d seen him naked in quite a while, and it somehow seemed more personal now that they knew each other.

“It felt _good,”_ Shiro said, still sounding amazed. “And I remember- did you like the falls?”

“It was beautiful,” Lotor said, blushing as he helped Shiro lie down. If Shiro remembered… did he remember seeing Lotor naked too? Why did the thought of it fill him with heat?

He slipped his shirt off and moved to lie down beside Shiro, curling up on his side facing away from him and biting his lip. He needed to get it together, he had to-

“I’ve been wanting to show you,” Shiro continued. “I- and now I- we can do anything we want.”

“Yes,” Lotor whispered, his heart pounding in his chest. Shiro was lying so close beside him that Lotor could practically feel the heat radiating off of him. “Anything we want,” he said, screwing his eyes shut. Suddenly what he wanted was…

It was impossible. Even thinking it seemed dirty and strange. They were- they were-

What were they?

Nothing seemed to quite capture the strange devotion Lotor felt to the man lying beside him. And to make it all worse- he couldn’t help picturing Shiro naked, his powerful body made up of pure muscle.

Lotor was hard in his trousers and he wanted to touch himself so badly, but he couldn’t with Shiro lying beside him. His skin was damp with sweat and it was a struggle to keep his breathing steady. But he couldn’t let on what he was thinking. Surely Shiro would be horrified and disgusted if he knew, he’d-

“Lotor?” Shiro asked, moving closer and setting a hand on Lotor’s side. Lotor jerked at the contact, his breathing coming faster. Shiro’s hand was so hot against him, so big. He screwed his eyes shut as he tried to get himself under control. He needed to get himself together enough to tell Shiro that he was alright.

Shiro slid his hand down, pressing his palm to Lotor’s lower stomach and painfully close to his groin. He moved closer, nosing at the back of Lotor’s neck. It felt amazing and terrifying. Lotor couldn’t understand what was happening as Shiro let out a deep shuddering breath.

“Lotor,” he whispered, moving slowly to press a kiss to the back of Lotor’s shoulder. Lotor’s eyes flew open as Shiro moved his hand down, pressing his palm gently to Lotor’s groin. He gasped in shock, trembling as he fought not to rut against the faint contact.

“Is this alright?” Shiro asked.

All Lotor could do was shut his eyes and nod, too afraid that this would end.

Shiro tightened his fingers and Lotor’s lips parted around a gasp. This was nothing like touching himself. This was something terrifying and beautiful, something he could have never imagined.

“You smell amazing,” Shiro breathed out before moving to mouth at his neck, his hand more insistent over Lotor’s cock.

It was all Lotor could do to stay quiet, tightening his grip over the furs. He didn’t know how this had happened, was too afraid of doing the wrong thing and making it stop. Shiro’s hand felt so good over him, caressing him firmly over his pants.

“Help me,” Shiro whispered and Lotor gasped, moving his trembling hands down to unfasten his trousers. As soon as he finished Shiro pushed him away, shoving his hand past the cloth to take Lotor’s cock in a firm grip.

“Shiro-” Lotor bit out, overcome and unable to stop himself.

“Is this alright?” Shiro whispered into his ear, making him shiver. “Should I stop? Do you want me to-”

“Don’t stop,” Lotor managed, flushing so hard he felt like his face was on fire.

“Mmm,” Shiro hummed, moving to press hot open-mouthed kisses to his neck, his shoulder, every bit of bare skin he could reach. His hand sped up and Lotor couldn’t stop the quiet moans falling from his lips, couldn’t stop the restless shifting of his hips into Shiro’s touch.

He’d never thought it could be like this. He’d always thought his first time would be on his wedding night with some foreign princess while a dozen courtiers waited restlessly behind a silk curtain, imagined what it would be like to try and lead a woman through the experience while he was equally unsure.

This- curled together on a pile of furs with a man who seemed to know exactly what he was doing- was somehow more strange and wondrous than anything he could have imagined. It felt so good, so right, and he knew it was because it was _Shiro_ with him and not some stranger.

Shiro swiped his thumb over the head of Lotor’s cock and it sent a sharp thrill of pleasure through his body.

“Let me hear you,” Shiro whispered and Lotor could only shut his eyes tighter, breathing hard as he arched into Shiro’s touch. On the next stroke he let himself relax a little, let himself moan- and Shiro chuckled warm and dark against his skin, biting sharply at his earlobe.

“There it is,” he murmured. “There- just like that. Let yourself-”

After that Lotor couldn’t stop the moans even if he wanted to. Shiro kept a tight hold on him, kept kissing him so gently. All the while he was stroking him, confident and strong while Lotor could barely keep himself together. He could feel Shiro’s erection against his ass and the thought of it made him even more aroused, and through it all Shiro was _whispering_ to him and he was flushed and lost and exactly where he wanted to be.

“You’re so lovely,” Shiro whispered. “So pretty for me. I love the sounds you make. Gods- you’re a gift, a feast, you’re-”

Lotor cried out, his cock pulsing in Shiro’s hold as it all got to be too much. 

“Oh,” Shiro murmured, somehow managing to sound awed. “Oh. Lotor-”

“S-stop it,” Lotor managed, still shaking. “Just- stop. Shut up.”

“Sorry,” Shiro said with a quiet laugh, kissing him behind the ear as he stroked Lotor through the aftershocks. He wiped him off with a scrap of cloth before wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him close, burying his face in Lotor’s hair.

He was still hard, Lotor could feel it. He bit his lip as he forced himself to ask nervously, “do you want…?”

“I have everything I want,” Shiro said. “I have you in my arms.”

“That’s-” Lotor breathed out in shock. “That’s- you’re- a sap.”

Shiro laughed, pulling him in closer. “Maybe I am. I’m just- so happy you’re here with me. I’m so happy you’re- you-”

“Shut up,” Lotor muttered, flushing even harder as he closed his eyes. “Just- just go to sleep.”

“Alright,” Shiro said, moving forward to nuzzle his neck while Lotor tried to hold back a shiver. He tucked his cock back into his pants and stumbled over the fastenings before he managed to relax again, still awed at the feeling of Shiro wrapped around him. He felt amazing- warm and safe like never before.

He had sweet dreams that night about wolves and lakes and a pile of furs, and through it all- Shiro’s soft even breathing.

* * *

In the morning Shiro kissed him awake and stroked him off again, and somehow afterwards their day fell into the same routine that they’d gotten used to. They gathered firewood and water; they checked the traps they’d set and at Lotor’s insistence they cleaned the furs. That night Shiro pushed him back against them, holding Lotor’s hips tight as he used his mouth to bring him off while Lotor could only clutch at his shoulders and fight to catch his breath.

It became its own strange and wonderful routine- Shiro touching him, pleasuring him.

“Let me touch you,” Lotor managed to plead, days later. “Let me-”

“I don’t think it’s… safe,” Shiro said quietly, shaking his head. “I’m not sure I could… stay in control if you did.”

Lotor didn’t push after that, even though he couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

Shiro would transform during the day to go out hunting, or to take Lotor sight seeing. Once he took Lotor down to the village and Lotor bought clothes and boots and supplies- grain and sugar and coffee and tea, pans and pots and cloth and a sewing kit. He bought oil too, and tried not to blush as he handed over the coins to the merchant. He wouldn’t be using it for cooking, that was for sure.

Later that night he stripped while Shiro watched, and laid down on the furs with the bottle of oil.

“Take off your clothes,” he murmured as he slicked his fingers. “I want to see you.”

Shiro bit his lip uncertainly, blushing as he watched Lotor pushing his fingers inside himself slowly. Finally he stripped too, and climbed onto the furs beside him when Lotor beckoned him closer.

“It’s alright,” Lotor said in a shaky whisper. “Touch me.”

Shiro touched him with the same care he was used to, gentle and sure. His hands were shaking when Lotor took him by the wrist and guided his fingers down, lower.

“Lotor,” Shiro groaned, his skin bristling black for a moment before he settled into his human form.

“It’s alright,” Lotor insisted, trying to urge Shiro to press his fingers inside, deeper. “I want- please.”

Shiro let out a shaky groan as he pushed inside and Lotor opened for him, spread his legs for him. He raised his hands to clutch at the furs as he rode the feeling of Shiro inside him, fucking him.

“I want more,” he whispered at last, opening his eyes. “I want all of you.”

“I don’t- it isn’t-”

“Please,” Lotor managed. “You want it too. Please. It’ll be alright.” He didn’t know if it would be or wouldn’t be, but he needed all of it- all of him.

He watched as Shiro’s resolve wavered, and then he growled and leaned in to kiss him, wild and carefree.

Lotor opened for him, drew him in, and then Shiro was moving and flipping Lotor to his belly, pushing his thighs open wide.

It was terrifying- it was perfect. It was nothing he’d ever felt before as Shiro slicked his cock and started to slowly push inside. He was huge and Lotor cried out, shuddering as he tried to force himself to relax.

Shiro paused, stroking his sides, kissing his back. “Easy,” he whispered. “Easy, now. Let me in-”

Lotor groaned as Shiro pushed in deeper. The stretch burned like it hadn’t with fingers, but it was good too. Shiro’s bulk was draped over his back, between his thighs. His cock was sinking deeper inside and there was nothing Lotor could do to stop it and it felt amazing.

He’d never felt so taken and never thought he’d want such a thing. He shifted a little to spread his legs even wider and they both groaned, gasping as they clutched at the furs.

 _“Yes,”_ Shiro hissed. “You’re so tight and hot. So perfect.”

“Just- move,” Lotor managed, screwing his eyes shut. And Shiro moved- slow at first, gently rolling his hips. It was on the edge of unbearable- stinging and huge and perfect. There was something about being out of control that had Lotor wild and gasping, writhing over the furs. And Shiro pushed in and out steadily anyway, ignoring the way his body shifted, the way his breath hitched.

And then the burn faded and all he wanted was _more_ and Shiro was still being so gods-damned _careful_ that Lotor wanted to claw the furs up, wanted to turn and mount him and just- _take_ his pleasure. But Shiro was heavy and immovable above him, moving languidly despite Lotor’s whimpers and laboured breathing.

“Come _on,”_ Lotor hissed. “Harder, faster- just- please!” 

It came out pathetically needy but he had no time to feel ashamed. Shiro chuckled into his ear and sped up and he couldn’t _think_ anymore. He couldn’t even arch his hips up into it, all he could do was take it- the forceful pounding of Shiro’s cock in and out of him.

He whined and scrabbled at the furs like a wild thing but Shiro laughed and took his wrists, pushing them down to keeping him frozen and trembling.

He wanted _more_ but there was nothing more to be had- up until he felt the unmistakable swelling at the base of Shiro’s cock.

“Oh fuck,” he managed, pushing up into it.

Shiro was too wild by then himself to stop it, he only groaned and started fucking into him faster.

“Yes, _yes,”_ Lotor chanted, over and over. The knot at the base of Shiro’s cock was swelling more and more and started to _burn_ but still Lotor wanted it- all of it.

 _“Yes,”_ he groaned as Shiro moved in and out of him, as his own leaking cock rubbed up against the furs. It was the most perfect thing he’d ever felt, and then it swelled more as Shiro pushed in, and suddenly it was the edge of too much, and Shiro stilled with a loud gasp.

Lotor could _feel_ it, pulsing inside him with short jerks. He whined, shifting needily with the desire to really feel it fucking him, but Shiro stayed stubbornly still, breathing hard. Lotor tried to push back against him but Shiro breathed out a soft sigh and bit gently at his earlobe.

Lotor whined as he tried to rub his cock against the furs to try and get some relief. He felt on edge, too open, too full, and it still wasn’t enough.

“Mmm,” Shiro hummed, wrapping an arm around Lotor’s waist and turning so they were lying on their sides with Shiro’s cock still inside him.

“Please,” Lotor begged as Shiro stroked down his chest and lower until he _finally_ took hold of Lotor’s cock and started to stroke him- slowly and almost lazily, like he had all day.

Lotor shifted restlessly, flushing harder at the feeling of Shiro still buried inside him, too big to ever leave his awareness for more than a moment. “Faster,” he pleaded, but it was no use. He turned his face to pant against the furs, shivering and overwhelmed.

“You feel so good,” Shiro murmured, sounding lust-drunk and so perfectly content. “You’re so perfect, so lovely for me. Does that feel good? Do you like it?”

 _“Yes,”_ Lotor moaned. “Yes, would you _just-!”_

Shiro chuckled, low and warm, and finally, _thankfully,_ his hand sped up and Lotor couldn’t hold in the cry as he finished, his cock pulsing in Shiro’s grip and his body clenching around him. Shiro whispered sweet nothings to him while he came down from the high, his hand still gently cradling Lotor’s softening cock and still almost too intense to bear.

He was still inside, the feeling different now that Lotor didn’t feel adled with lust, but not unpleasant.

“So,” he said finally. “How- how long does this last.”

“I don’t know,” Shiro laughed. “I suppose you should be more careful about having sex with strange beast men living in caves.” 

Lotor could already feel Shiro’s knot growing smaller so he scoffed, too worn out to move for the moment. “It’s just the one beast man, at present.”

“I should hope so,” Shiro said, nosing at the back of his neck before finally, carefully, pulling out.

Lotor breathed out a sigh of relief, shifting into a more comfortable position while Shiro reached for a scrap of cloth to clean them up before moving to gather Lotor in his arms.

“Was that… alright?” Shiro asked, oddly bashful.

“It was amazing,” Lotor murmured. “And you were worried. You should listen to me more.”

“Yes,” Shiro laughed. “Alright.”

* * *

“We could go South, perhaps,” Lotor said as he strolled through the forest, Shiro padding behind him in his wolf form and sniffing around for rabbits. “To Olkarion,“ Lotor continued. “I hear they have all sorts of marvels there- self driving carriages and ships powered by steam. I hear they’ve tamed fire itself and use it to trace pictures in the night sky.”

Shiro couldn’t answer in his current form but he barked agreeably.

“Or maybe we’ll head North, to Puig,” Lotor said, imagining the sort of life they could make for themselves there. “They’re a peaceful people. We could build a little cottage, and- and- maybe I’ll sell books. Write them, too. And you could- well I suppose you could do whatever you liked.”

He caught sight of a bush heavy with wild berries and smiled, heading over to it while Shiro went off up the game trail. He’d nearly filled the satchel when he heard a snapping branch and looked up with a laugh.

“There’s a feast here! We could buy flour and bake pies-”

He broke off as he finally saw the source of the sound- a woman standing on the trail before him.

“Dayak,” Lotor said, his breath catching in his throat.

“Prince Lotor,” she whispered, the relief clear on her face. She was wearing traveling clothes instead of her customary severe gray frock and there was a pack slung over her back.

Lotor blinked in shock as she strode over and wrapped him up in her arms. He returned the embrace without a second thought, closing his eyes at the familiar smell of her, the warmth of her arms around him. 

“Dayak? What-”

“You didn’t return,” she said, pushing him away to look at him, her eyes glittering with tears. “They said you were dead, but I- And then I heard rumors that you were seen in the village, and I knew I had to come. Whatever’s happened, I’m here to help you. I’m here to take you home.”

“Dayak, no,” Lotor said, shaking his head. “You don’t understand.”

“I’ll help you kill the beast,” she said. “We’ll say you did it alone, and your father-”

 _“No,”_ Lotor insisted. “It’s not like that. It’s nothing like what we thought. He’s not a _beast,_ Dayak. He’s not a monster.”

“What are you talking about, child?” she asked, her tone firm and scolding. “What’s happened to you?”

“Nothing,” Lotor bit out, flushing. “Nothing _bad._ I thank you for your concern, but-”

Dayak’s eyes widened and she went pale. Lotor didn’t need to turn to see Shiro looming behind him, he could hear the low growl filling the meadow.

“The beast,” Dayak whispered.

“Dayak, no,” Lotor tried. “It’s alright, it’s-”

“Get back,” Dayak said, shoving him to the side. Lotor nearly ended up sprawled to the ground in shock, turning to see Dayak raising a crossbow loaded with a silver bolt to point at Shiro’s face.

“No!” Lotor yelled, but Dayak was already moving, pulling the trigger. Lotor was moving too, and then there was pain blooming in his chest and he couldn’t quite draw a breath as he fell to the ground, a silver crossbow bolt embedded in his chest.

“Prince Lotor!” Dayak cried out in horror.

Shiro made a strange sound like a wail, full of pain and rage.

“Shiro, no,” Lotor breathed out. “She’s a friend. Don’t hurt her. Please- please don’t-”

“Prince Lotor,” Dayak sobbed, dropping to her knees beside him and pressing her hands to his face. There was another wail and then a second pair of hands on him, Shiro’s hands.

“What did you do,” came Shiro’s voice, trembling and rushed. “What did you-”

“Don’t hurt her,” Lotor managed, his vision going dark at the edges. “She didn’t mean to. He didn’t mean to. Just don’t- don’t…”

* * *

There was blinding pain everywhere- his head, his chest, his shoulder. Somewhere close by someone was crying, the small breathy gasps of someone who’d been crying a long while and no longer had the energy for outright sobbing.

Lotor opened his eyes with a wince. He was back home- back in his and Shiro’s cave. Dayak was kneeling beside him, her face red and blotchy.

“Prince Lotor,” she whispered when she saw him blinking up at her. “Thank the gods. He said it would work, but I… Thank the gods.”

“What happened?” Lotor asked, looking down at himself. He remembered being shot, but it had only been one bolt to the chest. Why was most of his torso bandaged? Why was there a semicircle of even red pinpricks of blood circling his shoulder?

“Where’s Shiro?” Lotor demanded, trying to rise.

Dayak set a hand over his uninjured shoulder to press him back into the sheets before wiping her eyes. “The beast man… he went out for firewood.”

“Lotor.”

Lotor looked up to see Shiro standing in the doorway, his bundle of wood forgotten on the ground as he stared.

“That’s _Prince_ Lotor to you, beast,” Dayak hissed. “Or Your Highness.”

“Don’t,” Lotor said, suddenly afraid of what Shiro would do now that he knew the truth. He’d been a soldier in the Queen’s army, before. Altea and Daibazaal weren’t exactly on good terms. What would he do now that he knew that Lotor wasn’t only Galra, but that he was the Galra Prince? That he’d been hiding the truth from him for all this time?

Shiro sighed and walked closer. “Your highness,” he said as he sank to his knees on Lotor’s other side.

“Don’t,” Lotor said. “Don’t call me that. Not you.”

Shiro reached for him as if to brush his hair out of his face but Dayak shot him a sharp glare. 

“Don’t touch him,” she said. “Haven’t you done enough?”

“Haven’t _you?”_ Shiro spit back.

“I’m fine,” Lotor said quickly. “I feel fine.”

For some reason Shiro and Dayak only looked more pained and Lotor swallowed heavily. “What happened,” he demanded. “What’s going on?”

“I had to do it,” Shiro said, not meeting his eyes. “I had to. You would have died otherwise.”

“Oh,” Lotor breathed out, one hand going to his aching shoulder. “You bit me.”

“Yes,” Shiro whispered. “But I- I can teach you to control it, the way you taught me. You can live a normal life. You can go home.”

“When your father sees your new power he will welcome you,” Dayak said. “You turned last night, I saw for myself. You were glorious. You could lead armies. We could take Altea at last, and you’ll go down in Galra legend, remembered until the end of time.”

Shiro breathed out a soft sigh, looking away. “Yes,” he said quietly. “I suppose you could.”

He’d expected Shiro to rage and yell, to plead with him to stay. But he simply accepted the thought of Lotor leaving, of becoming an enemy.

It was strange to think that he had a way home now. It was strange and unexpected, but it was everything he’d ever wanted- so long as he left behind everything he’d come to care for. If he left behind Shiro.

It was strange how easy it was to make the choice. He’d been making it for a long time now, and he didn’t intend to change his mind.

“I don’t want to go back,” Lotor said, watching as Shiro looked over at him, eyes wide and lips curled up in a tentative smile. Lotor reached over and took his hand, cradling it close to his heart. “I don’t want to leave you.”

“Prince Lotor,” Dayak said, devastated.

“I’m sorry, Dayak,” Lotor said. “I love you. But I can’t go back. My life is here, and so is my future. Please- tell my father I’m dead.”

He moved to take hold of the silver dagger she’d given him so long ago, hissing as it burned the skin of his palm. He pushed it into her hands and smiled, feeling at peace now that the hard part of making his choice was done.

“Are you sure?” Dayak asked, a fresh wave of tears tumbling down her cheeks.

“I’m sure,” Lotor said as Shiro squeezed his hand. “I’m quite looking forward to seeing the world. And- don’t worry, Dayak. I’ll be sure to write.”

“Alright,” Dayak said, forcing a smile. “I won’t fight you on this, though you should know I think you’re just about the stupidest most willful child I’ve ever known.”

“I know,” Lotor said, smiling now too. He looked up at Shiro, staring at him in wonder. “I know.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


They say there are two beasts in the mountains. They say one is black as coal and the other as white as moonlight. They say they’re wild and feral and noble, that they protect travelers on dark roads on dark nights, that they hunt down the wicked. They say they’re too powerful to be killed and one can only be appeased by the presence of the other.

They say a lot of things, but Dayak knows the truth to the stories. She knows that they are happy as they travel the world, and the instances of daring rescues are more often accidental than not.

She has the letters to prove it.

  
  


_fin._

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr at [barbitone](http://barbitone.tumblr.com/) and pillowfort also at [barbitone](https://www.pillowfort.io/barbitone)


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